On a quiet summer weekend when almost everyone seems to have vacated town for prettier, seaside retreats, I will sometimes feel the need to dip something in drawn butter. That's when I head down the street to where Allen meets Hester for my own lobster shack experience, courtesy of Chinatown wholesalers and the Canadian lobster trade.
It's not en route to Maine, but for wholesale prices, anyone can walk into The Lobster Farm and pick the lobster of her choice from massive tanks categorized by size. Prices range from $8 and change per pound for 1-pound lobsters to $9.75 per pound for 2-pounders. (For comparison's sake, Fresh Direct offers 1 1/2-pound lobsters for $12.99 a pound.)
Someone will hold up the lobster to show you how alive it is, weigh it, and unceremoniously stuff it into a plastic bag. Request a female if you eat the roe. Supposedly a female also has a wider tail. I took a nice 2-pounder home, which was plenty for two, alongside an order of chipotle chicken nachos. I know it sounds discordant (i.e., trashy) but it was rather good all together--if you're stuck in concrete environs, you may as well have your favorite takeout food. You shouldn't eat tomalley (the green stuff), in case it contains dioxins from polluted waters, but I just had a little, and with a dash of lime on a tortilla chip, it approximates an upscale guacamole. (I share, for those of you who want to do this for your next Top Chef challenge sponsored by Corona.)
Steaming is the best way to cook a lobster if you're unsure of what you're doing. It's gentle and hard to mess up, even if you're off by a couple minutes. There are various steaming times cited on different websites, but I go with this one because people from Maine should know what they're doing (18 minutes for a 2-pounder). Dip in butter with a side of Old Bay seasoning. I don't own a whisk or a microplane grater, but somehow I have these. For clarified butter, you're supposed to melt the butter and spoon out the milk solids that rise to the surface, but I just nuked some butter in the microwave and moved aside the solids with a handy lobster claw.
The Lobster Farm is at 40-44 Allen Street, between Hester and Canal.
Not for the squeamish: (feisty, before and after).




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